My title of the article is misleading. Schizophrenia has been around since mankind began and as time rolled by, have we learned much about the illness. Indeed many people have stumbled upon some truths, but they are lost in the confusion and none are more prevalent than others. I myself have suffered Schizophrenia since my early twenties, a classic textbook case. However, not all experiences are the same and I will share with you my thoughts. I have grown and accepted the illness and I find myself more at ease and less concerned with the truth. It's been a long journey and not one without it's trials and tribulations, but then, how different am I? There is not one person I know that hasn't fought battles and lost a few in between. Tears are shed when you lose or regret. Personally I am glad for my life and what it brings. I have learnt that a little effort can bring rewards and a little love makes it a nicer place for us to be. Not everyone is so lucky. I'll take you back to my teens. I was only 16 when an event that occurred that changed my life. On entering my bedroom on an average afternoon, I was greeted by a roar and my vertical blinds parted in the middle. Small items that belonged in the room flew haphazardly across the floor. I was scared and frightened at the experience. I ran to my sisters room for comfort. Time went by when one day I met a medium, a psychic who told my fortune. She picked up on the event and told me not to worry but my spirit guides had come to contact me. I was intrigued and my interest in the spiritual realm took flight. I learned a lot about the 'otherside' and what our guides were about. It was during this time I was struggling with my sexuality. My crush on this woman at work turned to custard and I became increasingly paranoid about the situation. So much I left work and found another job. My paranoia was vicious and I thought my employers were privy to my dealings with this woman. This is where my guilt started creeping in. Years went by and I became increasingly depressed and dissolved in tears when I was alone. I could not hide my feelings for too long so I decided to fly across the world to meet my dad and leave my beautiful family and friends back home. I did not wish them to see me this way. Gradually things got worse until one day when I met my beautiful partner, I experienced a psychotic episode. I heard terrible things, I saw terrible things, I smelt terrible things. All my senses were affected and I was upset and confused. With the help of a good psychiatrist and loved ones I recovered. The medical staff did not patronize me, instead they let me think what I wanted to think. After all what evidence do they have that it is an illness? And what evidence do they have that it is not? I believe I can see and hear things from another plane and I also believe I suffer from an illness after all it does affect my health. People say, doctors say, scientists say you cannot marry both. But indeed you can. How else can I make up all those images, all of those sounds to be so precise and wondrous in my head. I am not imaginative, I am not a genius. Schizophrenia is misunderstood. It is misunderstood because of the inability to understand that there are other options to be explored. And until they have, doctors and scientists will always flounder, 'Where did it all come from?' |
