As customers, we all need to make these ten declarations to businesses in order to get all of the service and satisfaction we deserve.

I call it The Customer Service Manifesto.

(1) You serve me; I dont serve you.

(2) Give me as many satisfactions for my money as you can.

(3) Make the satisfactions relevant to me, to what I hold dear, and not to what is important to you.

(4) Be available to help me to achieve the results I anticipated when I purchased.

(5) Dont bullshit me.

(6) Pay me for any inconvenience I have suffered because of you.

(7) Surprise me with perks, just for the heck of it.

(8) Dont bundle what I really want with expensive, useless frills that I dont want.

(9) Make it easy for me to stop doing business with you.

(10) Never, ever completely eliminate the human touch from your service.

This article explores the first of these items: You serve me; I dont serve you.

A few weeks ago I was loading my items onto the conveyer at Safeway when the clerk snipped: Is that your cart?

No longer needing it, I had edged it away from the check stand before unloading my items.

Is it mine? I asked.

Yes, because if it is, we ask that you take it outside with you, she explained with pursed lips.

Hold it, I thought. Is she telling me that its my job to do their job of assembling the carts, inside and outside of the store?

In other words, am I suddenly working for them?

When I worked at Safeway, a zillion years ago, that was part of my job, and I was paid pretty well for it. Now, it is the customers?

Lest you think this is rare, consider the fact that one of my attorneys recently asked me to draft what I think should go into the brief that I hired him to write.

Yes, among other things, Im an attorney, too, but law and motion in this type of situation, are his areas, not mine.

These examples smack of what is called, reverse delegation. We, by being customers and clients, have delegated certain duties to people we pay, but theyre trying to shift them back to us.

When this happens, call it for what it is, and demand better service!